Question – Part 1
Nick, can you direct your followers to good advice on networking, or consider writing about it? I find that many people in my network don’t seem to understand the basics and what’s required.
Examples: I’ve reached out to two moderately good links in my network. One I’ve worked for in the past who likes my work, and the other, a weaker connection, is someone in my city who works in the same industry, whom I’ve met a few times and connected with on LinkedIn.
I asked my first connection for the name and contact info of someone in her organization who was hiring for a job I was interested in and, if she felt comfortable, an e-mail introduction. Instead, she contacted the person, gave them my name, and then told me the person would flag my application for consideration. What I wanted was to be able to send a strong cover letter and resume to the hiring manager directly. Of course, I was automatically rejected by the ATS.
In the second case, I e-mailed my contact, mentioned that I’d seen several recent openings at his company, and suggested we chat about how I might be able to help. He replied that he didn’t run the day-to-day anymore, and left it at that. He’s not interested but also oblivious to the fact that I can connect him with others in our industry and, if I’m not a good candidate, refer others to apply.
Bottom line: What’s so damn hard about providing a name and contact info to someone you know? Is the hiring landscape so bad now that everyone assumes job hunters are just pesky supplicants begging for a favor, and that they should be grateful for whatever help they get? Or am I expecting too much?
Nick’s Reply
You’re surprised your contacts don’t want to get involved when you ask for a professional introduction. You’d think you were asking them for an introduction to their daughter for a date! I have no data to back it up, but I believe people are loathe to help if they think it might backfire on them in any way. I see this again and again. That’s why I think it’s critical to avoid networking for introductions and instead shift to talking shop.
What networking is and isn’t
What you’re doing doesn’t work because (1) “links” are not a network and, (2) when you ask someone to give you an internal lead on a job they subconsciously – but correctly – view it as what I refer to as “putting the monkey on their back.”
How Can I Change Careers? includes a pivotal chapter titled “A Good Network is a Circle of Friends.” One section, “Seek advice, not help,” emphasizes the importance of having a specific objective you need advice about — whether you’re changing careers, or just jobs:
“No one wants the ‘Can you help me find a job?’ monkey on their back because the monkey requires feeding and lots of attention. That’s why most people you ask for help will quickly refer you to the personnel office. On the other hand, if you approach me for advice rather than help, that’s something I can provide…”
Networking explained
The advice you’re looking for is already on this website:
- The real value of a link is a function of the shared experiences you have with that person: Shared Experiences: The key to good networking.
- They know that if they agree to “pass your info along” you will be calling, texting and e-mailing them to find out “Did the person get it? Are they gonna call me?” See Say NO to job leads.
It’s just human nature. Networking is not about contacting people on your list and asking for help. Please see DOGE’d Out of a Federal Job: How to transition to the private sector. (Read the comment from JustMe. That’s networking.)
Don’t be frustrated. Everybody’s brainwashed to make networking a rote task that puts the burden on somebody else’s back. Try this test: When you think you’re networking, ask yourself, “Am I hanging out with people who do the work I want to do and talking shop with them?”
If you’re doing something else, it’s not networking. (And I hope you wouldn’t expect your LinkedIn contacts to set you up on a date!)
Next week in Part 2…
…This reader reports back and delivers a surprise: Networking wasn’t the problem or the solution!
“Thanks for the great advice. It’s the most movement I’ve had in my job hunt in years!”
We’ll discuss what he did and how he got the meeting he wanted. [Go to Part 2.]
Is there a “hook” you can use that will almost guarantee a hiring manager’s attention? What magic do you use to get that interview? Join us next week to compare your methods to those of this reader!
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It seems that most people don’t understand that networking is essentially the cultivation of relationships.
@Valerie: Career coaches and HR folks seem to think that’s just too simple, so even though it’s their advice, they don’t stop there (or just repeat it 3 times). They lard their advice with all sorts of other tips that are superfluous and just confuse people. It’s just that simple!
The best way to network is look for opportunities to contribute to the community. It could be staking chairs or sitting on the Board of a professional group. It could be giving timely advice to someone not as far along on their career path. It could be as simple as talking shop with others.
Sometimes we get a pass when we show up asking first. But people catch on quick and will figure out if we only show up when we want something.
For those who have been laid off before time has been taken to develop a community, ask for advice. Or an Information Interview.
To be clear, this is not a way to back-door in to a job. It is to learn about what is *really* being looked for and practiced in companies. And topics of interest when Hiring Managers are eventually met.
The best time to start networking was ten years ago.
The second best time in now.
@Gregory: You put it perfectly!
“The best time to start networking was ten years ago.
The second best time in now.”
I usually say “two years ago” but I’ll go with your ten!
Most important, this is the most important advice about networking!!
Dear Nick,
Asking for introductions to folks at a company you work for has risks. Asking for introductions to companies you USED to work for is more likely to get results.
Regards, Matt
Matthew R. Bud
Chairman
The Financial Executives Networking Group
32 Gray’s Farm Road
Weston, CT 06883
MattBud@TheFENG.org
(203) 227-8965 Office Phone
(203) 820-4667 Cell
The Power of Networking. The Power of Friendships.
The #1 I’ve run across (and I’ve been guilty of it at times) is that many times, people will only contact you when they need/want something – like an introduction or a reference from someone on the inside.
I’ve had to kindly say no to this type thing.
@David: Your decision is what protects the value of introductions and references. My compliments.